So I was at the Indian Restaurant the other day during the all-you-can-eat buffet. It's a great restaurant, but there's a huge amount of waste. People just slop on huge amounts of food and never finish it all. I did overhear an interesting convolution of a common idea at a different table where a little girl sat with a massive plate of samosas, saffron rice and nan bread racked up like one of those Richard Dreyfuss-Close Encounters of the Third Kind Mashed potato plate piles. Her mom stared at her tiny eyes peeping over this engineering marvel of a plate of food.
Mom: Eat all your dinner, sweetheart. Little girls in India are starving.
I spent so much time thinking about where that entire thing sat on the irony wheel, I forgot to eat. I was thinking about how much Mutter Panir I could eat if I really put my mind to it. It's just peas and cheese. The peas deflate in your stomach and the cheese gets ground up and moves out of the way. There is a potential for a truly epic act of consumption there.
What a freaky crazy question, this buffet seems to be phrased as: All you CAN eat. It's like a college hazing ritual challenge. How many goldfish CAN you stuff up your nose. Or the carnival. How many clowns CAN you stuff in a car. Or the Las Vegas international associated convention for Pornographic actors, artists and producers (PAAP, I guess). How many men CAN you bang in the space of a short 15 minute long video loop. Or how many gerbils CAN you convince to follow a cardboard tube into your rectum.
An Open Letter to Louisiana and The South from a Blue Stater. It's easy to think of things in terms of red and blue states and old aggressions. It's easy to let politics and policy and misconceptions get in the way of who we really are and how we really feel. If the fallout from the last election has left people in the South feeling like us Northerners hate them, I just wanted to clear that up now. As a Blue state resident.
Time, Sex, Money, and a Goat. I went to a pretty good college. It was located in Evanston near Chicago. If you've ever been to Evanston, it's like a version of Chicago with more bookstores, more coffeeshops and a soft cloud of patchouli drifting around downtown. Evanston has it all. They even have more trees than we do in Chicago, partly, I think, because they treat the trees like real people. I think both the head of the city planning committee and the lieutenant mayor are trees. I shit you not.
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Goodbye, Bob Moog. Bob Moog, the inventor of the Moog synthesizer, passed away yesterday at the age of 71 in his home in North Carolina from complications due to Brain Cancer diagnosed this April
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A Little Life A few years ago, I was playing a show with another band, a side project called Everplastic. It's a psychotic funk project- really a lot of fun. The live show consisted of a number of really good musicians- Siggtrigger Baldurson, the ex drummer for the Sugar Cubes, Xmas Smits, who used to play in Sister Machine Gun (and plays with us now) and a good friend of mine and amazing bass player who had worked with nearly everyone and had written the most annoying song ever on the radio. I'm keeping that one to myself.
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Alternate methods by Which Bill O'Reilly could execute some people on his crappy TV show The US has held over 650 people at Guantanamo Bay detention facility, including three boys between the ages of 13 and 15 years old. In fact, Guantanamo Bay has a dedicated children's facility where they house the OTHER prisoners who are 16 or younger. In this facility, the children are actually given tutors and even special children's mental health care.
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